Apple Fans Disappointed After Company Unveils Same Overpriced CEO That Barely Fucking Works

CUPERTINO, CA—Expressing fear that the Silicon Valley giant may be running out of ideas, the nation’s Apple fans expressed disappointment Wednesday after the company once again unveiled the exact same overpriced CEO that barely fucking works. “I’ve come to expect a certain degree of innovation from Apple, but now they…

A Farm-To-Table Board Game, For Manure Audiences Only

Brian Calhoun (right) makes guitars for musicians like Dave Matthews, but his newest creation is a board game called Chickapig — and he had a board custom-installed in Matthews

Virginia guitar maker Brian Calhoun devised a strategy game called Chickapig. (It features hybrid animals and pooping cows.) Now he’s getting some friends — like Dave Matthews — to spread the word.

(Image credit: Rodrigo Simas)

September 12, 2018

More Than 1 Million Ordered To Evacuate Due To Hurricane Florence

Over a million residents of the Carolinas and Virginia have been ordered to evacuate in anticipation of Hurricane Florence. What do you think?

The Bathroom Stall, Reimagined by an Architect

Mark Stankard offers humorous illustrations of new bathroom-stall configurations as drawn by an architect.

September 12, 2018

Claire Tomalin Moves ‘Between The Trivial And The Tragic’ In ‘A Life Of My Own’

After writing biographies of Charles Dickens and Mary Wollstonecraft, Tomalin turned to memoir. Her new work tells of her conflicting desires to have children and to lead a meaningful working life.

September 12, 2018

Whoa, Slow Down There, Buddy. Nobody Dates My Daughter Without Telling Me Which ‘Sailor Moon’ Character They Are First

Hey now, slow your roll there, chief. I don’t know what you think this is, but there’s no way in hell that you’re dating my little angel until you tell me which ‘Sailor Moon’ character you are first. Now go ahead and get comfortable so we can start this quiz.