Lena Dunham And Twitter Are Dragging Revolve For This Fat-Shaming T-Shirt
A shirt from Revolve has many people upset and protesting the brand for body shaming fat people.
Secret Letter Reportedly Contains Allegations Of Sexual Misconduct Against Brett Kavanaugh
Kavanaugh has denied the allegations. The letter, which Sen. Dianne Feinstein had kept from committee members, was referred to the FBI on Thursday.
Woman’s Children Officially Old Enough To Pony Up For Good Birthday Gift This Year
PHILADELPHIA—Emphasizing that “a lousy homemade coupon for free hugs dashed off at the last minute won’t cut it any longer,” mother of three Andrea Wolner told reporters Friday that her children were now officially old enough to pony up for a meaningful birthday gift. “Andrew, Gabe, and Jessica have jobs at this…
Top 5 Most Potent Celery Strains
24 Accessories Under $10 That Are Actually Gorgeous
The Onion’s 2018 Emmy Predictions
The 70th Primetime Emmy Awards, hosted by Michael Che and Colin Jost, will honor a combination of good and bad things that were on television from the past year. Here are The Onion’s predictions for this year’s winners.
High School Drama Teacher Already Has Pretty Good Idea Who He’ll Pick For Fall Girlfriend
DUBUQUE, IA—Noting his decades of teaching experience and keen eye for talent, East Dubuque High School drama teacher David Vargo already has a pretty good idea who he’ll pick to be this fall’s girlfriend. “There were so many strong contenders this year, so it took me a while to narrow it down, but at the end of the…
Second Fatwa Issued On Salman Rushdie For Derivative, Uninspired 13th Novel
TEHRAN, IRAN—Expressing consternation and disgust at the Man Booker Prize winner’s latest offering, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei issued a second fatwa against Salman Rushdie Friday for publishing a derivative and uninspired 13th novel, The Golden House. “This book is not only an affront to Allah, but also to any reader of…
Mike Pence Struggling To Reckon With Vision Of Prophet Muhammad Revealing That VP Destined To Become Next President
WASHINGTON—Deeply troubled by the communication received from a divine messenger, Mike Pence was reportedly struggling Friday to reckon with a recent vision of the Prophet Muhammad revealing that the vice president was destined to become the next president of the United States. “He told me that I was the chosen one…