Lucas Gardner writes a humorous description of a violent hayride mutiny and the rationalizations of its executor.
On #MeToo, Americans More Divided By Party Than Gender
One year after the #MeToo movement took off, new NPR-Ipsos polls show the nation deeply divided on the issue of sexual assault and harassment. The fissures run more along party lines than gender.
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Inmates Scrambling To Replace Whitey Bulger In Prison Production Of ‘Guys And Dolls’
BRUCETON MILLS, WV—Stressing the challenge of finding another actor with the stage presence necessary to bring the character of Nathan Detroit to life, inmates at the U.S. Penitentiary Hazelton were reportedly scrambling Tuesday to replace deceased mob boss Whitey Bulger in their current prison production of Guys And…
God Confirms Whitey Bulger Sent To Hell For Snitching
HEAVEN—Saying that the former organized crime boss was going where he belonged for his unforgivable sin after his death Tuesday in a West Virginia prison, the Lord Our God, Our Heavenly Father, confirmed that Whitey Bulger had been sent to Hell for snitching. “Look, I am a compassionate God, a merciful God, but there…
The Onion Looks Back At ‘Saw’
Trump Turns On Fox News And Tells Aides To Make Whatever They’re Saying A Law
WASHINGTON—Demanding aides write down every single word from the morning’s Fox & Friends broadcast, President Trump turned on Fox News Tuesday and directed his staff to take everything its anchors were saying and make it into a law, White House sources confirmed. “Whatever they’re talking about right now, just draft…
After Pittsburgh, Pharrell Demands Trump Never Play ‘Happy’ Again
Pharrell Williams issued a cease-and-desist letter to Trump after his joyous song was played at an event the day of the massacre — re-opening a can of worms around music usage by political campaigns.
(Image credit: Scott Olson/Getty Images)
America!: A Pre-Midterm-Election Guide to Hibernation
Ali Fitzgerald illustrates a humorous pre-midterm-election guide to hibernation, including questioning your sexuality and more.
Jonah Hill: Acting Was An ‘Amazing Derailment’ On The Path To Directing
Hill always wanted to be a writer and director, but an unexpected compliment in an acting class shifted him toward performing instead. Now he’s written and directed his first movie, Mid90s.
(Image credit: Tobin Yelland/A2)
‘Let The People See’: It Took Courage To Keep Emmett Till’s Memory Alive
Historian Elliott J. Gorn’s new book revisits the 1955 death and public funeral of the African-American teen. Critic Maureen Corrigan says it’s a timely story about the fragility of collective memory.
(Image credit: Scott Olson/Getty Images)