Annoyed Man Rates UberEats Driver 3 Stars For Having To Pry Order Out Of Their Dead Frozen Hands

PORTLAND, ME—Irked by what he described as unprofessional behavior, local man Cory Morales reportedly gave his UberEats driver a three-star rating Friday for having to pry his order out of the delivery worker’s dead frozen hands. “I specifically said in the directions to leave it outside my door on the porch, and here…

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Conservationists Tout Successful Restoration Efforts After Dolphins Spotted On Mars For First Time Since 1973

MARS—Heralding it as the culmination of years of hard work, conservationists touted their successful restoration efforts Friday after a pair of dolphins were spotted on Mars for the first time since 1973. “It’s incredibly heartening to see the long-endangered Baiji dolphin back on the Martian surface for the…

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