Month: August 2022

NEW YORK—Bemoaning how much time he had squandered on trivial grudges and petty whims, local man Stefan Krawitz, 91, reportedly used his last moments on Earth telling friends and family that he wished he had spent more time going to TheOnion.com. “As I lie here, knowing my end is drawing near, I can’t help but…

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ALLEN PARK, MI—In an effort to provide more support to the athletes during the most difficult parts of filming, the producers of Hard Knocks announced Tuesday they had hired an intimacy coordinator for the set of the show to ensure a safe environment for tackling. “Having an intimacy coordinator working closely with…

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PITTSBURGH—Hinting that there were plenty of ways to satisfy one’s breakfast cravings beyond what was listed, a menu reportedly suggested Tuesday that the local Bluebonnet Diner was open to trying anything the customer wanted to do to an egg, with “nothing out of bounds.” “Look, whatever you’re into when it comes to…

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Miyake defined an era in Japan’s modern history, reaching stardom in the 1970s with his origami-like pleats that transformed usually crass polyester into chic.

(Image credit: AP)

Mohsin Hamid’s surreal new novel centers on a white man who awakens one morning to find that his skin has turned brown. The Last White Man only seriously strains credulity at its very end.

(Image credit: Penguin Random House)

The novel Bronze Drum explores the legend of the sisters’ rebellion against Chinese rule and the idea of collective memory as resistance.

(Image credit: Grand Central Publishing)

I’ll tell you one thing: you sure couldn’t write a book like this today.

Georgia has announced that residents can now claim an unborn child as a dependent on state taxes, saying any residents filing their 2022 tax returns who had fetuses with detectable heartbeats at six weeks of pregnancy can claim an exemption of $3,000. What do you think?

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The Covid-19 pandemic shook up office life in ways both good and bad, ushering in a new era of remote and hybrid work that has become increasingly permanent due to employee demands. The Onion spoke to everyday Americans about why they refuse to return to the office, and this is what they said.

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Shouts & Murmurs by Jenn Knott: He leaves guitar picks everywhere. His denim clothes turn your laundry blue. He has a new song called “Sun’s Shining (and the Dishwasher Don’t Unload Itself).”