Democrats Face New Hurdle After Republicans Gerrymander All Left-Leaning Voters Into Single House District

WASHINGTON—Scrambling to respond to the sudden shift in electoral realities, Democrats reportedly faced new hurdles Wednesday after Republicans gerrymandered all left-leaning voters into a single House district stretching across the country. “Democrats were already looking at significant headwinds going into the…

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Night-Shift Janitor Leaves Behind Brilliant Solution To Israeli–Palestinian Conflict On U.N. Chalkboard

NEW YORK—Diplomats and personnel from dozens of nations stopped and stared upon entering the U.N. General Assembly Hall this morning and seeing that the night-shift janitor had left a brilliant solution to the Israeli–Palestinian Conflict on the chalkboard, sources reported Wednesday. “My God, he did it—he figured it…

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