Andy Borowitz jokes that Russian President Vladimir Putin has been backing Donald Trump in the Presidential race but is thinking about replacing him with Mitch McConnell, Devin Nunes, or Rand Paul.
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Author: Andy Borowitz
Dad Speaks For First Time In 7 Years To Ask If Anyone Has Seen Tape Measure
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Google Alert For Old Classmate Pays Off Big Time With Story Of Double Homicide
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So-Called Vegetarian Always Kills, Devours Chicken Whole Whenever She’s Drunk
DENVER—Expressing skepticism regarding Sarah Hastings’ holier-than-thou proclamations of support for animal rights and ethical eating, friends of the 23-year-old graduate student told reporters Thursday that the self-described “vegetarian,” in fact, kills and devours a chicken whole whenever she is drunk. “Sarah talks…
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Pitch-Perfect ‘Mexican Gothic’ Ratchets Up The Dread
Silvia Moreno-Garcia’s latest is true Gothic horror; set in 1950s Mexico in a creepy, isolated house where a young bride believes her new husband is poisoning her, and that ghosts walk through walls.
(Image credit: Del Rey)
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Author: Jessica P. Wick
How to Guilt People Into Wearing a Face Mask
Malaka Gharib offers a series of humorous illustrations showing various ways to try to get people to put on their dang masks, to protect the public against the coronavirus.
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Author: Malaka Gharib
Chicago Street Vendor Retires After Neighborhood Steps In To Help
At 70, Rosario del Real was still selling Mexican paletas. After his neighbors bought his entire stock, they raised enough money for him to retire.
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Boy Raises More Than $1 Million For Hospital That Saved His Life
Tony Hudgell, a 5-year-old boy with prosthetic legs, walked six miles to raise money for a London hospital that saved his life. He lost his legs as an infant due to abuse.
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Formula 1 season starts 4 months later in a different world
Formula 1 season starts 4 months later in a different world
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Report: Investors Urge Nike, FedEx, PepsiCo to End Relationship with Washington Football Team
Investors worth a combined $620 billion have urged several key sponsors to end their relationship with Washington’s football team unless its name is changed.
Investment firms and shareholders worth a collective $620 billion asked team sponsors Nike, FedEx and PepsiCo to end their relationship with Washington’s football team over its “Redskins” name, according to Mary Emily O’Hara of Adweek.
Per O’Hara’s report, the brands each received a letter signed by 87 investors urging them to cut ties unless the team’s controversial name was changed. The topic has gained momentum in recent weeks in the aftermath of the police killing of George Floyd in Minnesota, and the worldwide protests that followed.
On June 24, Washington removed a marble monument of team founder George Preston Marshall, who opposed integrating the team. Marshall was the last owner in the league to integrate his team.
The investment groups appealed to PepsiCo after the brand removed the Aunt Jemima image from its syrup. They also praised Nike for its relationship with Colin Kaepernick, but pointed out Nike’s role in providing uniforms and equipment to Washington.
None of the brands, nor the team, responded to Adweek’s request for comment.
On Wednesday, John Falcicchio, deputy mayor of Washington, D.C., said there was no scenario in which Washington team owner Dan Snyder would be allowed to build a new stadium on the federally owned RFK Stadium site unless he changes the team’s name.
“There is no viable path, locally or federally, for the Washington football team to return to Washington, D.C., without first changing the team name,” Falcicchio said, according to Liz Clarke of The Washington Post.
Added Eleanor Holmes Norton, the District’s nonvoting delegate to the House of Representatives: “I call on Dan Snyder once again to face that reality, since he does still desperately want to be in the nation’s capital. He has got a problem he can’t get around—and he particularly can’t get around it today, after the George Floyd killing.”
Washington currently plays at FedEx Field in Landover, Md. Its lease on the land the stadium resides is set to expire after the 2027 season.
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Author: Nick Selbe